Spasms of free thought

"It's the place where something's happening...though you may or may not be willing to watch it."

Friday, June 16, 2017

Drabble series: 11/15/2015

October 15th 2015-

Today's drabble. I had a good day at work. Guests like me. Of course I felt like going home every frickin minute. But then I finally did so and so I'm home at last.

And I wrote a bit more of my script today. Which is really act one of three and I'm barely done because I have to rewrite it. In fact, I want to have my projects immediately done. Guarantee. I don't want to stall anymore.

I know what's its like to stall. I don't like it. And I want to work on it. So many things I want to work on.

And I mean projects.

I want to work on being self-sufficient. Camera work, editing, producing and promoting. Which are all things needed to market good media.

I need my driver's, safety permit and my two courses. Then work my way up to the production office. Either that or join the writer's Guild while working in the DGC.

I need to beef up my skills with camera operation, at least basic editing, production, scriptwriting and promotion.

What else happened today? I felt like my prayers work. At work, I was at peace. Mostly. I was calm. Ok, I blabbed to Terri. And I know who I was with. I have to keep my mouth shut. I have to keep vigilant with what I say. It'll get me in a tizzy and in a mood and I'm already sensitive. I don't like Rickey. At least Ken is consistent and he's formal so yeah you feel awkward and intimidated but he isn't weird about it. But Rickey is just an asshole. He's "nice" after he blows shit up. Actually he always rebukes me. He's frankly abrasive. Some of my thoughts on him were less than sane to be honest. It included castration and frustration. Ugh. It wasn't pretty. Like. What the Frick.

I'm sorry Rickey but you can go fuck yourself.

I also liked the guest's complimenting me. It's rather bittersweet because I don't like working there anymore. It's always the guests and the customer experience that makes you stay.

Although at the same time, you have those who are great and those who cut you off; and I'm repeating your order so you can get it right as you want. If I tell you what's on your burger, that's because I want to be sure if its what you want. And Mark was a butt today. Like I do notice that if I'm not in the mood to laugh with you, then I will shut you down.

No, I don't give much of a shit about people. Ugh. At least in film, you have one job. And you are needed. You are all part of a great whole. And most of the time, its static and dynamic at once. You often have to wait in one place for one scene and amazingly, its a millisecond of a scene.

A whole day is barely frames.

Last thought: keep on keeping on. Calgary Inferno! I would love to watch the game. I am actually excited about the game. And I want to work on set. And darn it, drive. And travel. And kiss. And I want to party but if I can actually celebrate something. These days I would rather be on set. Or working. Like actively. And I want to be disciplined. Like. In all the things.

I want to release a short every 6 months! I want to blow up my Instagram! I want to have my own viewing party! Like I want my life to be in complete videos!

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